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THE BLOTTER
ISSUE № 00TKTK — TK-TK-26
BY: M.L. Nestel
Illustration by Rob Weiss
The Blotter.* A roundup of happenings in Gotham’s mean streets (and from time to time the tri-state region). Each item provides a staticky glimpse into the sleepless city’s peripheral misdemeanors, felonies, and misadventures.
⬛ MANHATTAN
▀ Lower East Side: Raging Brute Pummels Then Points Pistol At Woman
HE PUT HIS hands on her before aiming a gun.
So she told cops where he kept it.
A 35-year-old was taken away from the Lillian Wald Houses after clashing with a woman.
Authorities say at round 4:15 a.m. on Feb. 2, he was jousting with a woman, 26, (an acquaintance) when he slugged her in the face and then took a gun — and pointed it at her.
He also smashed her cell phone.
The damage must have been only slight since she was still able to call 911.
When the officers showed up, she explained what transpired and also directed them to the gun the woman-beating punk stowed.
He was found and hit with assault, criminal possession of a loaded firearm, menacing, and criminal mischief.
⬛ THE BRONX
▀ South Bronx: Lilliputian Looter Scores 3 Lighters
HE PULLED A knife on a bodega… for a six-dollar score.
Must have been jonesing real bad for a smoke or didn’t realize he was thinking super small time when he went kamikaze to knock off a market nearly zilch.
The 25-year-old was standing in the Walton Avenue Deli back on the night of Oct. 25.
He allegedly charged the counter where the clerk was manning the register and brandished a knife while swiping three lighters (worth a total of $6) and then taking off.
CCTV footage was shared with investigators who used it to track down the perp four months later.
Authorities charged the accused with robbery, menacing (stalking), weapons possession, and criminal possession of stolen property.
⬛ BROOKLYN
▀ Williamsburg: Porch Pirate Scores $25K Hospital Part + Dessert
A COOKIE MONSTER sated his cravings: having at his disposal expensive industrial health equipment and all sorts of sugar goodness.
Twice on the same day and from the same address the suspect allegedly struck — taking off with other peoples’ parcels.
The first time, the 29-year-old bilked boxes from a building on South 11th and Berry Streets was at around 10:30 a.m. of Jan. 21.
The victimized recipient reached out to cops and informed them a $50,000 MRI device was lifted. And there was probably going to any number of ways the suspect was planning to utilize the advanced tech that would only work at hospitals or perhaps NFL franchizes who boast such machines on-site.
About 30 minutes later, he also took off with another box. This one was much more down to earth in terms of price tage. It was filled with $70 worth of cookies.
The cops were quick to pounce and nab the suspect before he could gobble up his merch of hock the hospital-grade equipment. He was taken down for burglary, rgand larceny, criminal possession of stolen property, and trespass.
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⬛ QUEENS
▀ Ozone Park: Catholic School Teacher Nabbed For Kissing And Pressing Himself Onto 14 Y.O. Girl
A TEACHER AT a shuttered Catholic high school was pinched for untoward behavior with a young pupil.
The 25-year-old man stands accused of kissing a 14-year-old girl’s lips and then pressing his penis against her leg.
The perverted acts dating back to June 2015, occurred inside St. Mary Gate of Heaven Catholic Academy on 101st Avenue (it’s since shutdown).
On Jan. 22, cops took suspect into custody from his Valley Stream, Long Island home and he was charged with three three counts of third-degree sexual abuse and endangering the welfare of a child.
He pleaded not guilty to all charges.
⬛ STATEN ISLAND
▀ Bulls Head: Rogue Defies Ban To Tell Ex ‘Go Fuck Yourself!’
SINCE LAST YEAR a woman thought her ex-boyfriend could take a hint.
Two different judges ordered him to stay away from even shopping int he same cereal aisle.
And yet he allegedly disobeyed several times.
The 55-year-old was supposed to keep away after a judge imposed a protection order that would stay in effect until Nov. 15, 2026.
He didn’t.
Authorities say on the afternoon of Dec. 2, the suspect sent the woman a text that read, “What the?”
That prompted a second judge to slap a second protection order that was to keep him away from her another month.
Again, the legal process didn’t seem to deter the deviant for he was spotted on New Year’s Day morning wheeling around in his white Dodge Durango at her apartment building’s parking lot on Dinsmore Street.
On Jan. 3, the suspect was driving his Durango and allegedly crossed over two double yellow lines on Victory Boulevard near Graham Avenue. After crossing he whizzed passed and swerved into the woman’s car that she was driving, according to the criminal complaint.
When she made it to work that morning, the suspect allegeldy was loitering nearby and at one point drove his Durango up to her and blabbed, “Go fuck yourself,” while giving her the bird.
Four days later the suspect allegedly returned to the woman’s home parking lot and when she discovered him lurking there — he allegedly yapped, “Drop the charges!”
He was brought into custody on Jan. 12 and arraigned on criminal contempt, (follow/communicate/violation order or protection), stalking (follow), tampering with a witness, reckless endangerment, and harassment.
⬛ NYCSTALGIA
▀ Linden Boulevard (New York, NY) - 1980s
«SOURCE»
⬛ ET. AL
▀ NYC > DC (Krypton, NY)
▀ Polly Dines With The Pigeons (New York, NY)
«SOURCE»
▀ Cheeky (New York, NY)
«SOURCE»
▀ Human Pylons (New York, NY)
«SOURCE»
▀ Grid Unlocked (New York, NY)
«SOURCE»
▀ STYLEtation (New York, NY)
«SOURCE»
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*When perusing The Blotter, know that arrests do not constitute guilt, and all suspects are innocent until proven guilty. Moreover, the reported items are merely a snapshot of a criminal matter – what is known at the time of publishing. In most cases, the persons arrested for breaking the law haven’t been convicted (yet). It’s also possible that the charges brought against them may be reduced or even withdrawn.
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