A MASSEUSE PRETENDER was caught molesting an unsuspecting woman. 

The “client” had entered a space on Eldridge Street back at around 9:30 p.m. on Nov. 25. 

The 47-year-old allegedly started to massage the woman and then he got especially handsy with the woman’s privates. 

Authorities say the suspect placed his nasty tentacle fingers on the woman’s vagina “two separate times”, according to the criminal complaint. 

The lusting perp then allegedly moved his fingers around the woman’s breasts used a “circular motion on her nipples”, the papers say. 

The woman told cops that the sicko twice placed her hand on his “erect penis”. 

Once cops arrived they instantly determined the man performing these illicit sexually-charged acts was about as qualified to massage as a toddler molding Play-Doh is to construct a skyscraper.

They found he lacked (surprise!) a New York State license. 

He was subsequently brought up on unauthorized practice of a profession, forcible touching, and sex abuse.

TWO SIBLINGS SQUARING off inside an apartment turned physical.

The 39-year-old woman was throwing a fit inside of an apartment on Lafayette Avenue near Hunts Point Avenue on the afternoon of Nov. 2.

Their shouting match had the suspect snatching her sister’s Android cell phone from her mitts and “throw” it onto the ground rendering it unworkable.

She then allegedly launched a bout where she allegedly shoved her kin around and capped off, “I’m going to beat you up!”

Cops were called (with another functional phone). Upon arrival, they took the sister away in cuffs and she was booked for criminal mischief (damage property) and harassment (physical contact).

THEY USED A Pringles chips can and the rubber sole of their shoes to tune up the scoundrel who had the stones to show his whiskered mug in the neighborhood after being busted for hawking loogies at innocent women’s faces. 

At least four times in three days in November the 46-year-old aimed his spittle at women targets he spotted on the street. 

His insensate behavior of being unable to keep his fluids to himself began on Nov. 11. 

At around 10 a.m., the fiend first spit at a woman in her face as she was walking along Broadway near Marcy Avenue. 

Two hours later he found his second spitting victim just blocks away on Grand Street off Bedford Avenue. 

Some time ticked by until around 10:45 p.m. when the same suspect allegedly launched another spitting storm at woman in the same vicinity. 

And the next morning the same unsavory was hovering around Marcy Avenue and South 4th Street when he allegedly spit at another woman. 

Other Williamsburg women were spared this man’s oral wrath once cops caught up to the mouthy perp on Nov. 12. 

They hauled him into custody and leveled several counts of aggravated harassment and disorderly conduct raps.

But it was after he was freed when he endured a kind of shitkicking comeuppance. 

No-mess locals inflicted a beatdown on the suspect — kicking and pounding on him with fists and trampling him repeatedly until the point was made and his face was bloodied. 

“Stop violating these bitches,” one of the enforcers whom we’ll call Hero 1. “Stop violating these females out here. You heard? We tired of that shit.

“You making us look bad, n---a!”

The suspect allegedly tried to say the message was reached loud and clear.

“I heard you,” he said, before being jostled and shouting, I HEARD YOU!”

He continued, “I went to jail. They locked me up for that.” 

But the man’s short lockup didn’t phase them one bit.

“N---a — we worse than jail n---a,” quipped his reeducator.  

Video of the hurt he suffered shows him wailing as the tag-team go to town on him. 

FULL DIALOGUE DURING THE ALTERCATION

HERO I: "Shut the fuck up. Stop violating these bitches. Stop violating these females out here. You heard? We tired of that shit. You making us look bad, n---a!

HERO II: "Next time we're gonna drill you so bad you're gonna be stretched, n---a!"

HERO I: Stop violating bitches n---a!"

PERP: I heard you. I HEARD YOU! I went to jail. They locked me up for that.” 

HERO I: N---a -- we worse than jail n---a. 

PERP: “I heard you already. I heard you!”

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“CHINK, CHINKY, CHING-CHONG!”

Those and others amounted to the insults allegedly lobbed by a 31-year-old man at an Asian pair.

The big talker was standing with his pals outside Whitney Avenue near Macnish Street at around 5:30 p.m. on Oct. 2.

“Come on, man,” answered the man.

The words did little to simmer the suspect’s tantrum.

He and his posse charged the man and pounded him to the sidewalk where they kicked him again and again.

The woman that he was walking with tried to be the hurt man’s human shield — “laying her body over [him]” on the ground to ward off the thugs.

But her bold sacrifice didn’t do much to stand down their aggressors.

They knocked her around some more with another dosage of kicks and punches.

They were taken to a local hospital where medics tended to the man’s broken nose and helped the woman with her bruised arms and hands.

Only the lone mouthy one was taken into custody while his chums scattered.

He was charged with assault as a hate crime and aggravated harassment.  

A GHOUL FUSSING with a woman’s garden declared his craven intentions. 

Just after noon on Nov. 3, the 37-year-old hood was recorded on a doorbell cam along with other forms of surveillance messing around on a woman’s front and backyards. 

Authorities say he slithered into the backyard at the home located on Castelton Avenue off Elm Street. 

There, he allegedly created a catastrophe, eradicating the woman’s wooden flower bed frame and then repeatedly stomping on it, according to the criminal complaint. 

He then allegedly raised two metal garden stakes and peered toward the woman’s home, and belted, “I’m going to rape you and kill you!”

Three days passed before the same punk was recorded again on the woman’s property. 

He allegedly snooped around and discovered bags containing the woman’s wardrobe and tossed the articles everywhere and left.

On the late morning of Nov. 15, the same goon allegedly came back for a third time. This time he was captured on surveillance stammering around the porch and peering through the windows, the papers say. 

Authorities moved to lasso him and secured criminal mischief, trespass, menacing (with a weapon), weapons possession, and harassment charges.

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Edvard Gordon Till: Duster is my favourite 80's NY writer (along with Poke)

Share George Coleman: Ghost Yard action week night married to a car to the right RAZ & SHAME 125TH

Cricket Patrick: Duster has one of the best SYMMETRICAL STYLE in graffiti. One of the best outlaw artist

Jay Nadav: This style of letters from both these heads were perfectly done by them. And are still being copied today

Danny S Reller: Seen got burned here by Dust! Just calling it like I see it, cuz I love Seen too!

Dennis Elliott-DeLeo: One of favs. 👊🏽 #UA

Jose A Carrero Jr.: I would still be toying toy letters if they hadn't had so much style and g Funk in the blueprint what the games been missing stay blessed writers .

A CONSEQUENTIAL LANE pass led to quite the standoff.

A Mercedes driver attempted to cut the gridlock by pulling into oncoming traffic.

When the driver came bumper to bumper with an NYPD SUV cruiser.

The bright lights were blaring.

First the bold driver attempted to reverse and go around the cop to its right.

But the chess move was predictable. For the cruiser shadowed the Mercedes.

Then, the driver reversed again to the right where the lane cleared up. All of a sudden two police (one blue uniformed and another white shirt) appear in the frame and try their worst to stop the driver by sheer brawn.

But the unflinching lawbreaker clearly doesn’t know surrender. The driver punches the gas and flies out the intersection o Humboldt Street and Flushing Avenue; the cops clenching on by their fingernails until they had to let go.

… Someone queried X’s AIhelper, Grok about the incident and the response didn’t exactly render much.

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*When perusing The Blotter, know that arrests do not constitute guilt, and all suspects are innocent until proven guilty. Moreover, the reported items are merely a snapshot of a criminal matter – what is known at the time of publishing. In most cases, the persons arrested for breaking the law haven’t been convicted (yet). It’s also possible that the charges brought against them may be reduced or even withdrawn.

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