
THE BLOTTER
ISSUE № 00160 — 06-29-26
BY: M.L. Nestel

Graphic by Rob Weiss

The Blotter.* A roundup of happenings in Gotham’s mean streets (and from time to time the tri-state region). Each item provides a staticky glimpse into the sleepless city’s peripheral misdemeanors, felonies, and misadventures.
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⬛ MANHATTAN
▀ Union Square: Spineless Woman Clotheslined 85 Y.O. Granny To Undergo Brain Surgery
SHE MIGHT HAVE been safer fending off an elephant stampede charging toward her.
An 85-year-old woman was strolling around East 16th Street by the park when out of nowhere a woman came up behind her and tossed her to the ground.
The victim didn’t get back up.
So brutal was the attack to the pavement, that the granny was found unconscious and in her right hand was dangling a piece of her scalp.
Meantime, the perp, a 29-year-old woman, scampered off.
Cops responded to the scene and spotted the attacker.
The Brooklyn woman had some run-ins in the past.
Such as her bust on March 9 where she was hit with threatening a man with a Taser inside a Bed-Stuy building.
She was formally charged with assault (victim 65 or older).
The victim was rushed to Bellevue Hospital where she underwent surgery to remedy an open cranial fracture injury to the face.

⬛ THE BRONX
▀ Fordham Heights: Psycho Gal Forces Way Into Woman’s Flat, Gnarls ‘I’m Going To Shoot You Straight In The Head’
SHE WASN’T WELCOME.
But that didn’t stop her from demanding the world and everything in it.
On the night of May 8, a woman says she was unlocking the door to her apartment located in a building on Ryer Avenue near Grand Concourse.
When she entered there appeared almost in horror movie fashion a lunatic woman trailing from behind and shoving open the door to slip inside.
‘I’m going to beat you up!’
There, she found the tenant using the loo.
It was in her indisposed state that the 37-year-old perp grabbed her hair and declared, “I’m going to beat you up!”
She then went to work on her — roughing her up about the body.
The victim shook loose and then darted to her bedroom for refuge.
She reached the room and instantly shut and then locked the door.
Unfazed, the perp charged the door like a bull snorting a mountain of blow then screamed: "I am going to shoot you straight in the head!"
She continued to the pound on the door to make good on the threat. So much so that the door broke.
Cops took the intruder into custody and she was brought up on burglary, assault, criminal mischief, and harassment.

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⬛ BROOKLYN
▀ Canarsie: Appalled Woman Call Cops After Ex Texts Secret Sex Tape
IF SHE WAS hoping to savor a morning and a drama-free breakfast — her ex upended it. He might as well have drowned her eyes in hot maple syrup.
On May 13, the woman had to watch a video texted to her from an anonymous number.
The video showed her face and her bits.
But it didn’t take Sherlock or Watson to crack the cypher.
All arrows pointed to her 35-year-old ex.
She knew it was him because the phone number matched a Zelle account that he had used in the past.
Moreover, she called the number and the dipshit answered.
He was bagged on June 7 and now has to defend against unlawful publication of an intimate image.

⬛ QUEENS
▀ Far Rockaway: ‘Who Should I Hit First — You Or Your Mom?’: Hit-And-Run Driver
A MEAN MOTORIST clipped a mother on her wrist and then drove away.
On the afternoon of May 15, the driver of a red Honda SUV bearing Massachusetts plates was jawing with a woman outside Westbourne Playground located on Mott Avenue.
“Who should I hit first — you or your mom,” the surly woman snapped.
And without getting a retort, the driver was witnessed (and recorded on video) erratically shifting into reverse and hitting the gas.
The move struck a woman, wounding her hand and wrist.
She then allegedly took off like air.
It took time for the authorities to pinpoint the cruel assaulter — but on June 2, they got their woman.
She was taken down for leaving the scene of an accident with injury, criminal possession of a weapon (with intent to use), and assault (with a weapon with injury).

⬛ STATEN ISLAND
▀ West Brighton: Rogue Busted Keying Man’s Ride
IT WAS A tearjerker of a video.
CCTV captured footage of a vandalizing his parked car.
The perp, 62, discovered that on the night of May 10, his cherished car parked in front of a house on Caroline Street.
Whatever his purpose, he treated the ride like an Etch A Sketch.
It was left scratched all over the front hood and rear as well.
The video was enough to get the coppers onto the car hater.
He was taken to school on May 18.
Charges levied include criminal mischief (damage property in excess of $250)

⬛ NYCTALGIA
▀ ‘Man Who Deflects Bullets’ (East Village, NY)

GENOVESE FAMILY BOSS Joe Masseria was ambushed in front of his Second Avenue flat by two assassins.
They opened fire on him, but Masseria leaped for cover inside nearby Sopofsky's Dress Suits to Hire.
He then turned the tables and blasted the comers.
Out of bullets, he got behind the wheel of his Hudson Cruiser and punched it to the Bowery. He didn’t get away scot free.
Two workers were slain as they were in his escape path.
The beating of death earned Masseria to earn the rep as "the man who deflects bullets.”
▀ Money Grab (New York, NY)

COSA NOSTRA BIG Carmine Lombardozzi is led from the FBI office handcuffed after nailed for tranporting a $17,000 thousand dollar check from New Jersey to New York.
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⬛ ET. AL

▀ Train Tussle (New York, NY)

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▀ No Scared Of Heights (New York, NY)

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▀ NYPD Commencement (New York, NY)

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▀ Sea Takeover (New York, NY)

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▀ Robbery PSA

▀ Lambo Questions (NY, NY)

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*When perusing The Blotter, know that arrests do not constitute guilt, and all suspects are innocent until proven guilty. Moreover, the reported items are merely a snapshot of a criminal matter – what is known at the time of publishing. In most cases, the persons arrested for breaking the law haven’t been convicted (yet). It’s also possible that the charges brought against them may be reduced or even withdrawn.
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