In partnership with

THE BLOTTER

ISSUE № 00144 — 06-05-26

BY: M.L. Nestel

Illustration by Rob Weiss

The Blotter.* A roundup of happenings in Gotham’s mean streets (and from time to time the tri-state region). Each item provides a staticky glimpse into the sleepless city’s peripheral misdemeanors, felonies, and misadventures.


-BACK TB FOR $1/MONTH…

-CHIP IN:

-CLICK ADS: Each issue features an ad. If readers could simply click the ad(s) — it would be a small little token that the company pays out. Please consider this. Yes it will open a window. But think of it as clicking it for goodness sake.

⬛ MANHATTAN

Midtown: Hoops Pandemonium

THE EBULLIENCE OVERFLOWETH. 

Soon after the Knicks eeked out a win in Game 1 of the NBA Finals Wednesday night rowdy fanatics lost their wits — many decided to leap onto an ambulance, climb poles — and in one case, slug an NYPD Chief’s face.

The melee broke out about 11:30 p.m. at the tail end of the outdoor watch party. The event was attended by thousands of loyals to the royal blue and orange and white all glued to the two massive flat TV screens in the plaza on West 34th Street, outside Madison Square Garden, as the Knicks clinched the W by downing the San Antonio Spurs. 

Jaylen Wimbush, 26, of the Bronx was charged with criminal mischief, disorderly conduct and resisting arrest, after allegedly blocking the path of a Northwell Health ambulance that was trying to navigate through the crowd with its flashing lights and screaming sirens. 

Alex Porata, 22, of Clifton, New Jersey jumped on the stopped ambulance and that bought him disorderly conduct, obstructing governmental administration, and resisting arrest charges.

Andre Eason, 26 of Plainfield, New Jersey was charged with criminal mischief, assault (of a police officer) resisting arrest, obstructing governmental admiration and disorderly conduct for the fist to the NYPD chief’s mug when he refused to budge from atop an ambulance.

The man’s moment on the ambulance caused it damage. 

Five others were wrangled and issued summonses, mostly for disorderly conduct and most for climbing or attempting to climb poles.

@overtime

On the ambulance is insane 😭 #knicks #nbafinals #fans #newyork #msg

⬛ THE BRONX

Highbridge: Worker Caught Skimming Meat Market For $75K Worth Of

Illustration by Melissa Eiler

A LOIN LARCENIST was outed for ripping off his meat supplying employer’s inventory. 

The 28-year-old man allegedly pocketed nearly $75,000 worth of steak and chuck from JD Meat Market located on Ogden Avenue. 

Investigators say the crook started the carnage crime dating back at the end of January and up until June 2. 

That marked the end of the thievery (that is believed to be estimated at $75,000) because cops showed up and took the thief down.  

It’s alleged that his scheme was to do his daily duties at the warehouse and then at some point distract coworkers while he would go about selecting various choice cuts to knick. 

He now faces grand larceny, criminal possession of stolen property, and petit larceny. 

The SpaceX IPO is Coming? Are you ready?

Most retail investors will hear about the SpaceX IPO only after it's too late. And by the time the headlines hit, the volatility has already begun.

This exclusive briefing covers the early signals Wall Street is watching right now, the access paths most people don't know exist, and why the window to prepare is narrower than you think.

Inside, you'll discover the verified signals that typically appear before a major IPO filing, what retail investors can legally access before a company goes public, and the positioning strategies serious investors evaluate before the market shifts. Don't wait for the news to break—get the data you need today.

⬛ BROOKLYN

Bedford-Stuyvesant: One Nabbed After Shoot’em Up 

ONE MEMBER OF a four-deep set of alleged assassins was caught.

The masked crew clad in all black attire were witnessed on surveillance footage with a machine gun blasting several shots at a building on Willoughby Avenue in the middle of the night on May 21. 

One of the rounds grazed a woman’s shoulder standing at a glass door. 

The ballistic impact shattered the door. 

All the perps scattered in the wake of the shooting. 

Cops say one of the accused shooters had been seen maskless outside a building on Myrtle Avenue. 

That helped bring one of the members of the crooks into custody. 

Cops took one of them, a 20-year-old man into custody on June 2. 

He faces attempted murder, assault, criminal possession of a machine gun, criminal use of a firearm, and reckless endangerment.

⬛ QUEENS

Springfield Gardens: Sicko Caught Yanking Himself Outside Woman’s Home

SHE WOKE UP one morning to the sounds of song sparrows and sunny skies to the creep planted in her yard like an oversized, perverted, but whiskerless gnome. 

The ghastly sight occurred at around 11 a.m. on April 30. 

The woman was forced to call the authorities because the man standing out front of her home was naked from the waist down and playing with himself. 

That suspect turned out to be a 29-year-old perp. 

He was slapped with public lewdness and harassment.

⬛ STATEN ISLAND

Woodrow: Hit-And-Run Driver Plays Dumb, Says ‘I Am Sorry, I Did Not Know I Hit Her’

A MOTORIST ACTED the fool when approached by authorities about clipping a woman with her car as she was crossing a road — and then gutlessly driving off. 

The woman was traversing over the white-dashed marked walkways along Drumgool Road West and Foster Road back at around 7:30 a.m. on March 2. 

As she was doing so, the driver of a gray 2025 Nissan Altima, 37, struck her and then stopped. 

The woman was seen on CCTV exiting her car and walked the injured victim out of the street to the sidewalk. 

But then she fled before authorities arrived on scene. And also without offering her information to the woman in pain. 

When medics got there, they determined that the car-hit woman had suffered all kind of body wounds, especially to her blood-gushing head. 

Detectives tracked down the driver who allegedly pleaded ignorance. 

When presented with surveillance evidence showing the crash into the pedestrian — the woman at first acknowledged that the Altima in the footage was “my car.”

But no way she did such a dastardly act like strike a human being and then drive off. 

“I was driving home from work,” she said. “I saw a car hit the woman.

“The next thing I noticed the woman was on the ground in front of my car.”

So there was another car that struck down this woman. Not her was her story. 

She then doubled down. 

“I did not hit the woman.”

But she ultimately cracked and appeared to come clean. 

“I am sorry,” she said. “I did not know I hit her.”

So whether or not there was this other bad driver or now she did the wrong but was clueless, didn’t matter. 

She was charged anyway with operator leave the scene of personal injury accident, fail to use due care to avoid bike/pedestrian/animal, and right of way.

⬛ [SIC] CITY

▀ NYPD Spending Big Money To Put Its Ballistic Vests To The Test (New York, NY)


Sean O'Dubhghaill, Special to The Blotter

THESE DAYS A cop’s best friend might be a ballistic vest.

And to ensure every officer is protected — the department is shelling out beaucoup bucks.

That’s to determine if the latest and greatest shields that everybody must wear pass muster against the bad guys’ worst ammo.

The NYPD is in negotiations to secure a $430,000 contract with a Phoenix-based company to test the effectiveness of its ballistic vests and body armor before it's issued to the more than 35,000 uniformed members.

The company is accredited by the National Institute of Justice, putting the tech through exhausting lab tests to meet a certain level of quality standards.

Ballistics vests are part of the mandatory NYPD uniform, worn both and outside clothing.

The level 3 ballistic vests have a limited shelf life, with the effectiveness of it's interior woven Kevlar webbing (proven to the reaper gifting spinning slug) and ceramic plate inserts weaken over time from perspiration and age.

In NYC, even FDNY EMT's have been issued ballistic vests to safeguard against potential stabbings and shootings.

In October 2022, the NYPD purchased $24 million dollars worth of ballistic vests from a Florida based company to outfit the rank and file.

In July 2024, they paid a North Carolina company $490,000 for ballistic resistant vests for the NYPD Detective Bureau.

New lightweight, specially designed ballistic vests were introduced as a mandatory accessory for plain clothes detective investigators of the NYPD in December 2019.

The mandate was the byproduct of the friendly fire passing of Det. Brain Simonsen.

The 42-year-old was slain in February of that year, after getting tagged with a shot to the chest accidentally fired by an NYPD bullet.

Investigators determined Simonsen was caught in the crossfire as cops were neutralizing a robber with a fake gun sticking up a Queens cell phone shop. 

Regretably, Simonsen was armed with a ballistic vest at the time.

The suspect, Christopher Ransom, 27, was mortally wounded in the shootout. But he survived.

In October, 2021, Ransom pleaded guilty to aggravated manslaughter and robbery and is serving a 33 year prison sentence.

He won’t be eligible for parole until March 2047.

NYCTALGIA

▀ Soused (New York, NY)

«SOURCE»

▀ Walkers & Talkers (New York, NY)

SURVEILLANCE SNAP OF Gambino Family soldier Tommy Agro and ex underboss/consigliere Joseph "Joe Piney" Armone.

⬛ ET. AL

▀ Bike Lanes (New York, NY)

«SOURCE»

▀ Impatient Hack (New York, NY)

«SOURCE»

-30-

*When perusing The Blotter, know that arrests do not constitute guilt, and all suspects are innocent until proven guilty. Moreover, the reported items are merely a snapshot of a criminal matter – what is known at the time of publishing. In most cases, the persons arrested for breaking the law haven’t been convicted (yet). It’s also possible that the charges brought against them may be reduced or even withdrawn.

-----------------------------------------------------------------X

Say hey…

:missives:

:socials:

:support:

Keep Reading