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THE BLOTTER
ISSUE № 0056 — 02-02-26
BY: M.L. Nestel
Illustration by Rob Weiss
The Blotter.* A roundup of happenings in Gotham’s mean streets (and from time to time the tri-state region). Each item provides a staticky glimpse into the sleepless city’s peripheral misdemeanors, felonies, and misadventures.
⬛ MANHATTAN
▀ Washington Heights: ‘Are You Here To Fuck The Girls?’: Cathouse Gatekeeper Caught Luring Johns In Undercover Sting
TO GET TO the fun palace (in the form of a shabby apartment’s backroom) you have to pay admission.
And it varied.
Cops busted a flesh peddlers who allegedly profited from fiends hoping to get their rocks off and score with a woman.
“Are you here to fuck the girls for the regular $400 price,” the 43-year-old suspect allegedly posed to two undercovers posing as sex seekers outside an apartment building on West 144th Street back at around 1:45 a.m. on Oct. 25. “Or are you here for regular admission of $50 to enter and then be charged later based on what you want to do with the girls?"
One of the undercovers handed $400 to the man at the door and they were let in.
The one who offered the cash then sealed an agreement to “have sexual intercourse with a female in the back room of an apartment” for a slight discount of $350, according to the criminal complaint.
‘Are you here to fuck the girls for the regular $400 price Or are you here for regular admission of $50 to enter and then be charged later based on what you want to do with the girls?’
A month later, specifically around 1 a.m. on Nov. 22 — the same pair reappeared at the doorstep of the same apartment complex and were met by the same hedonistic host.
“What are you here for,” the suspect allegedly asked. “Are you here for the girls?”
He continued to inquire their poisons either seeking “regular admission” or a “package deal with the girls?”
One of the undercovers plunked down $160, the papers say.
The same suspect apparently bragged about his station at the establishment.
He allegedly told the undercovers, “This is what I do, these are my girls."
The suspect was then put into custody and brought up on promoting prostitution.
⬛ THE BRONX
▀ Longwood: Scalpel-Toting Shoplifter Tells Family Dollar Clerk ‘I’m Gonna Cut You!’
TWO DEVIANTS WENT to town at a Family Dollar store and then menaced the clerk.
The 42-year-old and his unidentified sidekick were seen rabblerousing inside the discount chain located on Longwood and Westchester Avenues at around 9 a.m. on Dec. 29.
The suspects allegedly stormed the store and then started stuffing goods inside their jackets, according to the criminal complaint.
A store clerk caught wise to the charade and attempted to get them to stop.
The accused repelled, cursing the clerk shouting, “Back up! Don’t touch me!”
And with a scalpel in hand — the accused said, “I’m gonna cut you!”
The pair then skidaddled away.
The perp was nabbed the same day and formally facing robbery (with a dangerous instrument,) burglary, menacing, weapons possession, and petit larceny raps.
⬛ BROOKLYN
▀ Bedford Stuyvesant: Juice Jacker Gets Unplugged
A REAL LIFE Benjamin Franklin was shutdown after allegedly pirating electricity from a city utility.
At around 4:45 p.m. on Dec. 9, the suspect, 47, was spotted siphoning power from a street light pole.
The power suck play took place on Stewart Street and Cooke Court.
Authorities say the offender “intentionally diverted from a public light pole” relying on wires running from the public light, according to the criminal complaint.
The diverted Joules were allegedly used energize the perp’s purported encampment.
The suspect was taken away and charged with theft of services.
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⬛ QUEENS
▀ Fresh Meadows: Burglar Trips Alarm, Gets Busted Lifting Luxuries
A THIEF WAS nabbed after looting a home after sloppily setting off the house alarm.
The 33-year-old allegedly penetrated the home on 65th Avenue off Utopia Parkway back at around 6 p.m. on Dec. 20.
Authorities say the perp smashed a back window and wandered around the home and pilfered a Louis Vuitton wallet, a Wi-Fi router, and a collector’s coin, according to the criminal complaint.
The total value of all the hot items tipped north of $1,600.
Surveillance video recovered by investigators showed the thief clad in all grey attire breaching the man’s home and then after the blaring sound from the security system — sprinting away and hopping the back fence.
They then captured him scaling another home’s rooftop a couple blocks away.
They reeled the suspect in and then hit him with burglary, grand larceny, criminal mischief, and criminal possession of stolen property.
⬛ STATEN ISLAND
▀ Westerleigh: Boxer And Panty Hose Heister Caught After 9 Months Targeting Same CVS
THE CROOK WAS into convenience and undergarments.
A suspected serial shoplifter was nabbed after going on a long stretch of stocking up using five-finger discounts at the same CVS on Victory Boulevard.
The 68-year-old clearly wasn’t about to keep the straight and narrow — and instead be a rebel and skip out on paying for goods.
The accused first struck the box store at around 2:30 p.m. on April 7.
It was then that the man allegedly punched hair appliances and stuffed them into a bag and skipped out without paying.
He allegedly returned to the same CVS on 9:15 a.m. on Nov. 27 when he cleared off a bunch of underwear from the shelves and bolted.
At around 8:30 a.m. on Dec. 4, the same accused thief dipped his beak again at the CVS; this time stocking up on some new clothes.
The suspect allegedly set foot back on the late morning of Dec. 28.
Authorities say he fleeced socks, leggings, more underwear and dumped all of it into a bag before taking off.
But cops were quick pursuit and nabbed the man that same day.
He’s since been nailed for petit larceny and criminal possession of stolen property.
⬛ WANTED V. NABBED
⬛ EVIDENCE ART
▀ X-Factor Hits (Bronx, NY)
VIALS OF DOPE next to an “illegal” revolver make up the fruits of a recent narco bust.
BACKTALK:
Andrew Davis: Concealed hammer. Nice. Don’t see many these days. Shoot from you jacket pocket. No jam.
Buyings Sellings: Stop making it so hard for people to get a pistol permit in NYC and it might be and illegal one
Charles Brandel: Not the Charter Arms Off Duty!
Juan Nicholas (responding to^): why lol ….only pure gun buffs or retired officers notice type make and model before anything else lol
⬛ GOTHAM, INK
▀ KASE-2 (Harlem, NY) - 1998
1998 Harlem hall of fame feat Kase-2 Rip
They call me the godfather of graffiti by SEEN
292 pages 4.20 lbs (big boy)
Free worldwide shipping no bad surprise
«SOURCE»
▀ Misc. (New York, NY)
«SOURCE»
▀ Misc. (Staten Island, NY)
▀ Beach 90 (Queens, NY) - 1987
Credit: Eric Oszustowicz
«SOURCE»
⬛ NYCTALGIC
▀ East 2nd Street and Second Avenue (East Village, NY) - 1983
Credit: Sven Kierst
«SOURCE»
▀ 86th Street & Lex (Upper East Side, NY) - 1969
«SOURCE»
▀ Gates Ave & Palmetto Street (Brooklyn, NY) - 1992
Credit: Edward Keating
«SOURCE»
▀ Grove Street & Seventh Avenue (West Village, NY) - 1950s
«SOURCE»
⬛ ET. AL
▀ McLaren Stuck In Slush (New York, NY)
«SOURCE»
▀ Flipped (Park Slope, NY)
A CAR SPOTTED turned over on Prospect West and 9th Street.
«SOURCE»
▀ 2026 (New York, NY)
«SOURCE»
▀ Food Truck 86’d (Bronx, NY)
A POLICE TOW truck gave a halal lunch truck the hook.
The cops say the food purveyors were “illegally parked” at a metered parking spot on East Tremont Avenue since September 2025.
Efforts to chat with the owner and workers apparently “were unsuccessful” nor “correct the situation” and that resulted in the impounding result.
«SOURCE»
▀ Chimeric Hawk (New York, NY)
Credit: ©2026 Francois Portmann / fotoportmann.com
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*When perusing The Blotter, know that arrests do not constitute guilt, and all suspects are innocent until proven guilty. Moreover, the reported items are merely a snapshot of a criminal matter – what is known at the time of publishing. In most cases, the persons arrested for breaking the law haven’t been convicted (yet). It’s also possible that the charges brought against them may be reduced or even withdrawn.
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