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THE BLOTTER EXTRA! EXTRA!
ISSUE № 00208 — 08-07-26
BY: M.L. Nestel
Graphic by Melissa Eiler
⬛ MANHATTAN
▀ Yorkville: Tasmanian Devil Dances Victory Jig After Being Sprung For Tearing Up Duane Reade ‘Boom-Boom-Bop!’
A WILY RASCAL was extra hot on his heels when he learned a judge would spring him loose.
The 40-year-old was taken into custody after allegedly wrecking a Duane Reade located on First Avenue off East 57th Street back on the afternoon of July 28.
A unit responded to the nuisance inciter and he wasn’t too bashful of his exploits.
“I know why you guys are here,” the Nostradamus allegedly boasted. “I was disorderly in the store.”
He then detailed exactly what kind of mess he wrought. “I knocking things off the shelf — ‘Boom-boom-bop!”
In court, the suspect was donning a black UFC T-shirt.
‘I was disorderly in the store. I knocking things off the shelf — Boom-boom-bop!’
-40-year-old miscreant admitting wrecked a Duane Reade pharmacy
The judge decided the suspect, who had racked up an eye-watering 25 priors, deserved to enroll in a diversion program and therefore dodge any hard time.
Her decision sent him over the moon.
And he even moonwalked — or whatever the dance steps were.
Even though the cuffs came off and he was breakdancing like a boss, he had to stick around and get started on one of his four court-mandated treatment classes that same day.
▀ Lower Manhattan: Porch Pirate Scores Parcel With $60K Baubles
IT’S LIKE A Brinks truck in a box.
A 51-year-old glutton ganked a FedEx package with beaucoup riches inside it.
It was around 10:30 a.m. on June 3 when the looter slipped into the building located on Canal Street and Church Street.
He was surveilled on camera snatching a FedEx parcel that happened to contain Nikos Koulis earrings and rings worth upwards of $60,000.
The artist’s work is prominently sold at posh retailers like Neiman Marcas and Saks Fifth Avenue.
The Bronx woman was busted the same day — about 11 hours later.
She was hit with grand larceny.
The recent blight adds to a long list of unheralded arrests including ripping off a Target (stuffing choice cut steaks into his jacket) and trying to sneak out the doors.
▀ Lower East Side: ‘You Are Stupid And You’re A Gay Fuck!’: Bigoted Ghoul Inflicts Brutal Belting Of Autistic Boy At Park
A YOUNGSTER WHO is on the spectrum was targeted by a dastardly act committed by a raggedy cad.
The hate speak was allegedly hurled at the boy inside Baruch Playground back on the night of April 29.
A 37-year-old man aimed a verbal dress-down against the boy, 12, in a spat — specifically tinged with anti-LGBTQIA+ sentiments.
“Move [your] backpack so it doesn’t get stolen,” the suspect warned.
Because the child, whose mother later informed police is autistic, failed to respond.
In fact, according to the criminal complaint, the boy started humming and singing to himself.
Being ignored and left to listen to the tunes of the unresponsive boy — only vexed the goon.
He chastised, “You are stupid and you’re a gay fuck!”
The brute left for a beat.
Only to return with a belt in hand and struck the boy with it on his chest.
‘You are stupid and you’re a gay fuck!’
-Accused bigot who belted autistic boy in park
And as he struck the child, the suspect allegedly shouted, “Gay!” multiple times, the papers say.
He stole away before officers arrived on scene.
The boy suffered minor injuries.
Months past.
But on July 5, investigators confirmed the collar of the suspect.
He faces assault (as a hate crime), assault, acting in a manner injurious to a child, and menacing (as a hate crime).
⬛ THE BRONX
▀ Mott Haven: Subway Sunbathing Gal Sends Pooch To Third Rail Death
A WOMAN SNARLED the subway system and snatched however many lives a dog has when she decided to taunt the Grim Reaper.
At around 3:30 a.m. on Aug. 1, the 36-year-old unhinged woman was seen reclining back on the 6 train tracks at the subway station located on East 138th Street and Third Avenue.
When cops arrived they found the woman clutching a dog in her arms.
The officers ordered the woman to extricate.
But she came in contact with the ever dangerous third rail — and killed the dog.
She was determined to be unharmed and taken into custody and given a psych evaluation at a local hospital.
The woman was then leveled with aggravated cruelty to animals, reckless endangerment, and criminal trespassing raps.
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⬛ BROOKLYN
▀ East Flatbush: Deviant Donning ConEd Vest Forces Way Into Home, Pistol Whips Hubby Then Runs Off With Wife’s Purse
A CALCULATED JOKER dressed up as a utility worker to tune up a couple and steal away with their loot.
The 56-ear-old allegedly stood outside the pair’s home wearing a bright ConEd vest located at East 54th Street on the afternoon of July 20.
Authorities say the suspect’s attire appeared to disarm the woman, 29, to open the front door of their home.
The brute barged in and immediately grabbed hold of her neck.
Her husband attempted to play the hero — but was quickly neutralized by the bad guy’s pistol-whipping hand.
The perp took hold of the woman’s purse and then fled on foot.
Cops were called.
They were able to track the dipshit using an app on the phone.
He might as well have swallowed a AirTag.
Because within a short couple clicks the perp was heading to the hoosegow.
The purse was recovered along with the wife’s phone and credit cards.
Cops also put into evidence a loaded pistol.
He faces burglary (causing injury), robbery (with a firearm), and menacing charges among others.
During his arrest, the accused was already sweating a gunpoint robbery case from May 4.
⬛ QUEENS
▀ Jamaica: ‘I Will Call ICE And You Have To Go Home!’: Abuser Caught Lording Over Woman With Deportation Threats
A LOUSE DECIDED to slap and shove a woman before making threats to ward off her calling the cops.
The abuse allegedly began back on March 4.
That’s when authorities say the 55-year-old gutless soul pushed a woman to the floor and slapped her face.
When the beaten victim threatened to call the police, the pugilist perp retorted, “If you call the police, I will call ICE and you have to go home.”
He continued, “And I will keep the baby.”
Fear apparently took hold of the woman’s faculties and she refrained from reaching out to the proper authorities.
Months past by.
‘You are bad to let the idiot drop you off on my block. I will kill you and the man.’
-Desperate man makes dire threat after woman accepts ride from a male friend
On July 10, the suspect appeared to make threats against the woman when he learned she had accepted a ride from a male companion.
In a text, the covetous deviant wrote her: “You are bad to let the idiot drop you off on my block,” it read. “I will kill you and the man.”
He then proceeded to send her pics of the male friend’s car.
That same night, authorities learned the brute shoved the woman around again and he pulled a knife out from a dresser and hissed, “If you think I am going let you kill me and fight me–”
This time the cops were summoned.
And the not so tough was brought up on coercion (immigration status), assault, menacing (with a weapon), and aggravated harassment (threat).
▀ Flushing: Ex-Hubby Caught Getting Grabby, Snatching Cell Phone
A VENGEFUL DIVORCEE was caught up in a brouhaha with his former bride.
The 61-year-old was allegedly hellbent on getting back at his ex when he confronted her on the corner of Main Street and 41st Avenue early evening on July 12, the criminal complaint states.
At one point the perpy lesser half grabbed hold of the woman’s cell phone and then yanked her shirt collar and when she tried to dash across the street — the maniac gave chase.
When he reached her, again he pulled on her shirt.
her ex-husband, approached her,
Grabbed her cell phone from her hand, and grabbed the collar of her
Shirt.
Deponent is further informed by the complainant that she ran across
The street and the defendant chased after her and again grabbed her by
the shirt.
With the woman in his clutches, the suspect then allegedly bearhugged the woman violently and “applying pressure.”
The attack was soon impeded when cops arrived and took the wife wrestling cell phone jacker into custody.
He was slammed with robbery, grand larceny, and criminal possession of stolen property.
⬛ STATEN ISLAND
▀ Port Richmond: Para-Transit Van Driver After Hit-And-Run Claims, ‘I Was Driving, But I Didn’t Hit Her’
A WAYWARD ACCESS-A-RIDE driver denied clipping a woman and then vrooming away afterward.
At 12:30 p.m. on July 6, a 22-year-old was driving the van, tasked with giving lifts to thousands of handicap and senior New Yorkers, and found himself in a quagmire.
He was driving the blue and white van and as he crossed through the intersection of
Port Richmond and Castleton Avenues — he allegedly failed to see a woman pacing across the crosswalk.
After impact, the woman crumbled to the asphalt and suffered a slew of wounds including cuts, bruises, and bleeding.
And rather than stop and call for help, authorities say the driver instead callously kept wheeling away.
Officers caught up to the absconder and quizzed him about fleeing after the collision with the pedestrian.
‘Why are you arresting me? Four cars turned in front of me!’
-Access-A-Ride driver, 22, who allegedly zoomed away after clipping woman walking across a street
He acted oblivious.
“Yes, I was driving,” he said, the complaint states. “But I didn’t hit her.”
So intent on his innocence in the matter, the suspect apparently tried to pawn off the cruel act on other drivers.
“Why are you arresting me,” he wondered, adding, “Four cars turned in front of me.”
So it must have been one of the other drivers — and not him. That was the crux of his argument.
He repeated again for good measure: “I didn’t hit her.”
That same day, the suspect was charged with leaving the scene of an incident without reporting personal injury.
⬛ NUMS
▀ Youth In Peril (New York, NY)
IF THE NUMBERS stay at the pace they’re on, 2026 is on its way to becoming an especially brutal year for NYC youths.
Halfway through the annual, there have been 60 victims ages 18-years-old and younger. That is only five shy of the entire 2025 total.
There were 10 fatalities involving youths for all of last year.
So far, this year has marked seven.
And in the number of trigger-teens… pinched for shootings is 63 — that’s one more than 2025 — and we’re only in August.
⬛ WANTED V. NABBED
▀ Lewd Actor (Staten Island, NY)
A SICKO BOARDED a bus and performed a vulgar act.
▀ Bigmouth Wanted For Subway Toss (Harlem, NY)
A PSYCHO WARRING with a 40-year-old straphanger on a 3 train platform Tuesday night sent the rival onto the tracks.
Good Sams pulled the man to safety.
⬛ GOTHAM, INK.
▀ Power Pellets (New York, NY)
«SOURCE»
⬛ EVIDENCE ART
▀ Detective Seizes Perp’s Weapon (Queens, NY)
Minus The Gun (Brooklyn, NY)
▀ Decibel Rung (Babylon, N)
A HONDA WAS souped up to serve as a mobile discotheque.
Cops responded to ear plugging residents accusing a speaker screwball blasting tunes on Bell Street.
The cops nabbed Steven Mejia for the stunt.
It was a sequel to a May incident in Farmingdale where he tried to blow peoples’ minds too.
He received a summons (again) and his rigged burbs blaster impounded.
⬛ NYCTALGIA
▀ Hells Angels (New York, NY)
«SOURCE»
▀ Crossing Guard On Classon Avenue (Brooklyn, NY) - 1957
Credit: Adelia Meluso
«SOURCE»
⬛ ET. AL
▀ Cops + Dodger (New York, NY)
«SOURCE»
▀ Hook, Line, & Sinker (New York, NY)
«SOURCE»
▀ Brooklyn Bridge Speedster Slowed (New York, NY)
«SOURCE»
▀ PSA Of The Day: Walkers Beware (New York, NY)
▀ Bumper Woes (New York, NY)
«SOURCE»
▀ Timber Trouble (Flushing, NY)
«SOURCE»
▀ Get Behind Me Satan! (Chinatown, NY)
ONLY IN New York would a church rectory, the business office and home to the clergy, display a burglary alarm decaled on the front door glass.
Seen here is the front door of the St. James Church Rectory on Oliver Street.
▀ Beamer Brawler (New York, NY)
«SOURCE»
▀ Sans Brakes (New York, NY)
«SOURCE»
▀ Into The Clouds (New York, NY)
«SOURCE»
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*When perusing The Blotter, know that arrests do not constitute guilt, and all suspects are innocent until proven guilty. Moreover, the reported items are merely a snapshot of a criminal matter – what is known at the time of publishing. In most cases, the persons arrested for breaking the law haven’t been convicted (yet). It’s also possible that the charges brought against them may be reduced or even withdrawn.
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The Blotter.* A roundup of happenings in Gotham’s mean streets (and from time to time the tri-state region). Each item provides a staticky glimpse into the sleepless city’s peripheral misdemeanors, felonies, and misadventures.
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